Monday, 1 December 2014

Lets all do it!! - #happiermeinthemaking

I could sit here all day and give you all the advice in the world, but that doesn't mean I'm taking action in my own life. Which I think is totally wrong, soooo... That's going to change! Over the past couple of weeks I have really noticed how sad my life has become. Everything I did was an absolute draaaaag and I seemed to find the negative in absolutely everything, so I decided to take action in my own life and then let you all know how to take action of yours!

But before I let you know all of my tips, you need to seriously want to take control of your life. Meaning.. you need to realise that your life is more sucky then it is absolutely amazing and that being sad is so not worth it anymore! Being upset is totally draining, and being negative makes this huge world we live in seem gloomy - and we shouldn't be living our lives like that. Life in general is amazing, but realising that just being alive makes you oh so lucky! So once you realise that we only have one life and that being upset is so not worth it, you may read on!

  1. Get rid of toxic people - By saying "toxic" people I mean people who.. influence you to do bad things, people who are generally negative or if they hurt you emotionally. Pretty much if anyone does something and it makes you upset. I know this one may be really hard but whether the toxic people are in your social group, or even people that you only see every now and again... GET RID OF THEM. 
  2. Declutter your environment - Making sure your bedroom or your main space is clutter free, trying to get a clear and happy headspace is so much easier when you wake up and your space is neat and you know where everything is.
  3. Always give yourself something to do - Whether you work, go to school or are at that stage in your life where you don't know what to do .. Always make sure you have a vague plan of the day, even if its - get up and go for a walk, clean your room, read a magazine. Giving yourself things to do makes your day feel more fulfilled and gives you less time to think about the bad things.
  4. Start saying "yes" more - Saying "yes" is something that I did very little of, but I've realised since saying "yes" I've come away so much more happy. I don't mean for you to say yes to that seedy guy that keeps asking you out, or to do something that is completely wrong - I mean if your friend asks you to lunch .. Do it! Stop saying no and coming up with your excuses, get out and say "yes" more often!
  5. Keep a positive attitude - As soon as that little devil up in your head starts saying things that you know aren't necessarily right or even nice -  find the positive or nice in whatever the situation is, sometimes I know that can be hard, but somewhere in this little situation there has to be a positive. 
Trust me, as you start these steps .. Over time you will start noticing a huge change in your life, thats not to say that some things still won't be sucky, because sometimes they will.. That's just life. But just makes sure that your bad days don't consume your life and that the absolutely amazing ones do. 

Love always, Kiara xx

Monday, 3 November 2014

☺Be happy, be beautiful.. let the real you shine through ★

Being happy and beautiful comes hand in hand, when you are happy, naturally you look beautiful and from that its easier to realize what makes

So instead of focusing all of our energy into bad energy, why don't we get out of the house and find what naturally.. makes us happy? I know that we all have our daily commitments, but creating atleast two times a week where its all about doing what you love is what everyone should be doing. Making yourself happy doesn't have to mean getting a holiday to Hawaii and sitting on the beach with a pina colada.. I mean that would make anyone happy, but lets find the smaller things that we can appreciate on a day to day basis. Whether its taking your dog for a walk, cooking a yummy meal, or catching a train to the beach and getting a tan, with sun screen of course, unless you want to look like this: 

Maybe even start up a happy diary, write everything you see that makes you happy. Look around I'm sure there's some beautiful flowers, or look up there's some beautiful birds. Try not to get caught up and forget that there is so much beautiful in this world, we just have to open our eye's up a little bit.

Being happy all of the time is a big ask, but if you focus your mind on being a happier person and not letting the bad outweigh the good then you are definitely heading in the right direction! 

So lets all take on this task - the "Making our self's happier and naturally beautiful" challenge. Find the little things in life that are great and don't let this big scary world get the best of you. 

Love always, Kiara

Sunday, 2 November 2014

Lonely or helpless?

Feeling alone without actually being alone is an emotion I'm sure a lot of us have felt at some point in our life. You could be standing in a crowd of people, or even with the person you feel the most comfortable with and still feel like no one really understand's what you're going through. It becomes even harder when a lot of the time you can't come to grips with what is making you upset or angry- for someone to understand what is going on in your head, you need to understand it yourself and when you don't it can make the people around you feel helpless, and can make you feel silly in return- but don't worry, whether you are the one feeling silly, or the one feeling helpless - I want to help you all.. so please read on!

When you feel like no body understands what you're going through, or how you are feeling it can make you want too wrap yourself up into one big ball and hide from the world. Knowing from on going experience you distance yourself or push away everyone that wants to give you a hug or a hand, and at the end of the day you will only take it when you feel its right. Coming to terms with the on going pressures, confusions and different pathways life can take, it can all feel like a huge burden that you don't know how to fix.

What a lot of us forget is that each person goes through it, some people can adapt to change and can deal with the struggles of day to day life a lot better then others- or they just appear to. Watching other people seem like their life is fine and dandy can make you question why you are feeling so down, but we have to remember that what's happening won't fix themselves!

We have to be proactive, whether you are feeling the pressure of school, work or just figuring out what to do with yourself- take these steps to make everything feel like a lighter load!
  1. Put all of your options/assignments/work out on the table - and put them in order of what should be done first to last (everything seems like such a truck load when you are looking at everything that you have to do, putting it in smaller tasks will make it easier for your mind to get around)
  2. Try and make doing your set tasks a joyful part of your day. Find a spot you feel comfortable in, whether its in your bedroom with some candles on, or by the beach. Set up the tasks or as you thought of them before "chores" and link it up with something you love to do- it will make it a little bit more enjoyable.
You have to want to fix yourself, otherwise no one else can help you. Feeling alone is an awful feeling.. so here are some ways to feel great !
  1. Don't exclude yourself, everyone doesn't hate you- its just that brain telling you that!
  2. Don't trap yourself in your house, whether you go down to the shops and do Mum's shopping or go for a coffee with your bestie - it will make you feel better
  3. Exercise!!!!!!!! I can't say this enough, it releases endorphins in your brain that make you HAPPY 
  4. Listen to happy music - we all know sitting around listening to sad music puts us in an even worse mood ... Or listen to this - it coincidently actually makes me happy every time I listen to it

Now if you are trying to help someone that hasn't quite been themselves lately, you have to remember to not take anything personally! If you've just been joking around with them and they get more angry then they usually would - I'm almost 100% sure its not your fault, you just seemed to be the person to cop every inch of anger or sadness that has been building up for a while. In a funny sort of weird way, its a good thing. Think of it as, this person trusts you enough to know that you won't be going anywhere after their crazy outburst!

Soooo.. what do you do if a person you love dearly hasn't quite been their self?
  1. Be PATIENT, as hard as it may sound you're going to be knocked down a few times .. meaning no matter how many times you ask what's wrong - they won't tell you until they're ready.
  2. When they do open up - even if it sounds a bit out of this world, please please please try to UNDERSTAND. There's nothing worse then opening up to someone and then they look at you like this

   3. Give them a big big HUG, everyone loves hugs.
   4. Take them out, be with them, don't let them dwell in their thoughts to much.
   5. And finally, just be there for them, remind them how much you love them & appreciate them.

To wrap this all up please remember that its okay to be confused, but don't let it sit up their in your brain and consume who you are. You are amazing, and you can do whatever you put your mind too.

Love always, Kiara xx

Thursday, 25 September 2014

My K2 experience.

My experience with K2 has honestly changed my whole perception on life. I want to be a voice which educates people on the side effects and state of mind you could be left in and an insight for those who have shared similar experiences.

When I experienced my ordeal I went online in search for answers, curious to know if anyone else had gone through what I had. However I found barley anything apart from what K2 actually was, but all I wanted was someone to relate too before I declared my absolute insanity.

Long after my incident I found a small number of people I could relate too, through the media I saw some cases, which were more extreme whereas others were mild but it did comfort me knowing I wasn’t alone.

I want to advocate that as teens we’re not invincible, although feelings may arise when you’re with your friends-but at the end of the day we are individuals and we do react to substances differently. I feel safest when I’m with my friends, but when I reacted to K2 no one was able to help me, not that they weren’t physically helping, but I felt completely alone and confused.

So what is K2?
K2 is synthetic marijuana in which herbs, incense or other leafy materials are sprayed with chemicals to mimic the effect of marijuana. K2 can make you experience any of the following –
•  Nausea
•  Psychosis
•  Anxiety
•  Headache
•  Hypertonia (increased rigidity, tension or spasticity of the muscles)
•  Heart palpation

The night I had a wake up call.
Picture this: you’re at a gathering with your friends - there are drinks, alcohol and a bunch of teenagers clowning around. Everyone has had a few drinks and you’ve heard through the grape vine that some people are smoking something you haven’t heard of before, so you join them.

My friends had a joint that was being passed around the circle; I think I had about three puffs and from there was when my night went down hill. (Naturally I’m a paranoid person, so I am sure that me doing drugs was a bad idea in the first place.) I remember all of my friend’s noticing that something wasn’t right. They were all trying to settle me but that only made it worse- I felt like everyone’s voices were echoing, like I was watching TV almost. Although they were trying to help, I felt as though I was sitting behind a glass screen watching all of it happen. Then I started to notice my hands almost ticking. I couldn’t stop moving them! My body started to go numb and I felt like I was looking into a black hole and memories were flashing by me, I remember I kept saying to myself “you aren’t going to die, just pull through it”. After this I went to bed, woke up the next day still not feeling completely there but I was all right. 

The aftermath.
After time went on the numb feeling I experienced began again at the most random times. There were days that I didn’t want to move because I was purely scared. I spoke to my Mum about it and she took me to the doctor. He told me it was “all in my head” and that I just had to get over it. My Mum and I honestly thought there was more to it, so she took me to our family doctor. Our family doctor knew that something just wasn’t right and referred me to a psychologist where it all began to make sense.

After a couple of sessions she explained to me that I am in the early stages of psychosis. Some of the changes seen during this phase include:

•   Changes in affect such as anxiety, irritability and depression
•   Changes in cognition such as difficulty in concentration or memory
•   Changes in thought content, such as a preoccupation with new ideas often of a unusual nature
•   Physical changes such as sleep disturbance and loss of energy
•   Social withdrawal and impairment of role functioning, which can include deterioration in school or work performance

My psychologist (who was absolutely amazing by the way) explained to me that there’s actually something in my brain that almost ticks over when I’m either tired or anxious, that’s why still to this day my body goes numb. That’s the simplest way to explain it. But she did explain to me that there are ways to help it occur a lot less, such as:

•   Exercise! It doesn’t help the “numbness” as much, but it releases good endorphins in your brain, which mean less anxiety/depression.
•   Find thing’s to occupy your mind eg. If you like reading.. read!
•   Try not to loner yourself, your brain starts running which can create depression/anxiety. Go to the shops and surround yourself with people – it helps, trust me.
•   Sounds odd- but if you are feeling numb get somebody to squeeze your hands, it works wonders.

At a young age we are prone to venerability due to peer pressure, whether it’s others forcing the drug down our throat or the fear of missing out. Not at any stage was I pressured physically to do K2 but mentally I felt I had to be included. If you're thinking of trying K2 or any drug please just keep in mind that you could be apart of the minority that aren't so lucky, and if you are going to try it for the first time please do it in a safe environment and around people you trust.

If you've had an odd experience with drugs, or are considering trying it please don't be afraid to talk to me. I'm no doctor, but I hated feeling alone after my experience and I honestly wish I knew more about it before I tried it. 

Kiara xx